Fuck Carlos Mencia

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

I fucking hate Carlos Mencia. Every time a commercial for his show comes on, a child dies somewhere in the world. I am more likely to laugh watching C-Span 3 than Mind of Mencia. There is nothing even remotely humorous about listening to a half-German and half-Honduran dickhead yell the word "Beaner." That's right, he's not even Mexican. He is half-German, which explains why he's an unfunny, racist piece of shit. And don't give me this bullshit about how he's "too edgy" for me. I hate that even more. Every time he comes on TV to explain why he's light-years ahead of the rest of us in his un-PC humor, I uncontrollably punch through my television, which is becoming a rather expensive habit. Carlos Mencia is the least clever, least funny human being on television. I refuse to even use the words "comic" or "comedian" in the same sentence as his name because that would indicate that he makes even the slightest attempts at humor, which he does not. If he really thinks that yelling "dee dee dee" in reference to mentally retarded people is going to trigger the biochemical interaction that causes a rhythmic expulsion of gas known as laughter, he ought to be castrated. I have yet to meet a single person who finds him or his show funny (I puked after watching five minutes of his stand-up special). If anyone knows of anyone, a brother, father, sister, relative of any sort, dog walker, homeless person, anyone at all that finds Carlos Mencia funny please e-mail webmaster@georgetownheckler.com with their name, number, address, sleeping habits, allergies, diseases they are susceptible to, and any other information that might be useful. Let the search begin!