This Blog Post Is Going On A Pumpkin

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Here's the deal: our job is to make fun of the stuff that goes on here. But we can't do that if nothing is going on here. What the hell happened to The Hoya? It used to be filled with stupid stuff administrators do, stupid stuff student groups do, and racism and homophobia and all that good stuff. But, besides lucking out with everyone getting noroed a few weeks back, there's been nothing.

The cover story for Tuesday was "Students From Swing States Favor Obama, UWire Study Reports." Really? You don't say. Not only does Obama have a big lead in national polls, but college students support him? How has the national press not covered this?

Then I see their cover photo:


Look, they just took a photo of that fucking pond by W-G'r. Wow. Apparently that's a major news event, that pond continuing to exist on campus. When I was a freshman they had gay people kissing on their front cover, just to get the crazy Catholics to flip out at them. Those were the days!

Now there's been barely any meaty news stuff coming out. What's the problem? Does The Hoya just totally suck at journalism now, or are the people around here too lazy and concerned with "classes" to beat up a gay kid or throw a brick through Max Sarinsky's window? How are we supposed to write our issues, much less this blog, if there's nothing going on?

And what about you, Stewards? You re-paint the Hoya Saxa sign? You relaunch the Academy, but make it boring? You haven't even promised to fund a Heckler issue this year before pulling out of your commitment after it's been printed? Give me a break. Show your dedication to Georgetown by at least stealing the Healy clock hands or kidnapping DeGioia or something. Seriously, you asked that weird Knights of Columbus kid who plays Super Smash Bros. every Saturday night in the Village C Alumni Lounge with his friends from high school to become one of you? C'mon.

Somebody do something before I have to do a parody post of that George III blog. Please. I don't want to acknowledge that thing. Or actually dig up stuff that's going on on campus myself.